Tag Archives: Raising Girls

December 16, 2014

Last night I was sitting on the couch in the living room working diligently on my book. I was encased in the story playing out in my head and writing it all down as quickly as possible when I hear laughter coming from the girls’ room. The 7 year old and 13 year old are actually getting along and talking to each other. This is an extraordinary event so I put down my notebook and listened.

The 13 year old is bestowing a very important reality check to the 7 year old.

13 yo: “Oh yeah, school is Soo much harder when you are in 8th grade, like seriously!”

7 yo: “Really? Do you have a bunch of reading and math and stuff?”

13 yo: “Oh yeah and we have a bunch of different classes and teachers, not just the two teachers that you have now.”

7 yo: “I’m never going to make it in that hard school.”

13yo: “And you can forget about recess. There are no more recesses when you get older, only a 30 minute lunch, then it’s back to more school work.”

7 yo: “No way! No recess? How do they expect us to be kids with no recess?”

I was laughing so hard at this point I didn’t hear the rest before they came out of their room. With the big sister reassuringly resting her hand on the 7 year olds shoulder.

So this morning I thought I would play with the 13 yo a little bit.

Me: “Hey what do you have planned at school today?”

13 yo: “Nothing much, just wrapping up some tests before the Christmas break.”

Me: “Cool. Hey how about I come up there and eat lunch with you?”

13 yo: “Uhhh, Mom we don’t really do that sort of thing in 8th grade?”

Me: “What!?!? But hey all your friends love me and I’ll get to meet those boys all you girls are always talking about on the weekends!”

13 yo: “Mom, NO! Seriously, you can’t come up there. I don’t want you to meet those boys. “

Me: “I could totally hang out with y’all and we could maybe sing some of those songs y’all are always singing along with on YouTube. Hey maybe we could sing to those boys you like. We would be the coolest people at lunch.”

13 yo: “You have got to be kidding! NO WAY, I am dead serious mom. DO NOT COME TO LUNCH!”

Me: Smiling deviously “Alright, if you insist but I’m telling you I could totally talk to those boys you are shy around and make sure they notice you. Just let me know if you need my help and I’ll be up there in a heartbeat.”

13 yo: “OMG, Mom. You are impossible. I said I wouldn’t mess around with boys, I do not need you to get involved. I am going to school now to get away from this madness.” Shaking her head and grabbing her backpack on the way out the door.

The 7 yo who is waiting about 30 more minutes for her bus to arrive comes to sit next to me on the couch and says, “That was awesome! If you do go to her school and eat lunch with her one day will you please let me come along? I’ll totally show you all the boys she likes, I know what all of them look like.” We high five and start laughing while waiting. Being a single parent is tough but there are moments of greatness. 😉

“Raising kids is part joy and part guerilla warfare.”

–Ed Asner


November 24, 2014

Today is a monumental day in our house. It is the day I am introducing The Lord of the Rings trilogy to the 7 year old. My favorite story of all books in existence, and with my love of the written word, that is no small feat. From the moment I was introduced to J.R.R. Tolkien’s world, I was changed. I began to let my imagination run wild when reading these stories of Middle Earth and all the creatures that lived there both big and small, for good and for evil.

I am not certain exactly what is was about Tolkien’s written word that swept me away and I am confident I never will know. I am just delighted to have read them. Now, on this first day of Thanksgiving break, she has come to me and said, “Can we please watch this movie? I really want to see it with you.” I couldn’t say no to a request like that. I have already told her that if she likes the movies (of which I have all the extended versions which will take us about 10 hours to finish the story) we will read the Hobbit together so she can see things from Bilbo’s point of view.

One thing though has brought a small sadness while watching The Fellowship of the Ring, to hear the name “Precious”. These movies came out when I was in the thick of my first D/s relationship and that was the pet name that He always called me from the moment He knew how much this story meant to me. It isn’t exactly Him that I am missing or really even thinking about our past relationship, just the fact that I don’t have that special connection with anyone anymore. With a heavy sigh, I try to push down the despair and focus on showing the 7 year old the greatest story of all time. I am optimistic I will one day have that kind of extraordinary relationship again. To quote Tolkien’s best friend C.S. Lewis…

“We have nothing if not belief”
–C.S. Lewis

November 20, 2014

I walk in the house today with some really good news, which hasn’t been happening a lot around here so I am anxious to share it with the girls. Finally, after weeks of long interviews, negotiations, previous vacation plans, and so many phone conversations I lost count, I have gotten a huge promotion at work. I was approached a while ago for the position but felt my life was in too much turmoil to add the stress of an administrative job to it but then things went completely stagnate in my life and I figured, why not. I have no personal life to speak of so I might as well work more hours and make some extra money (which I can use for more beach vacations, so it’s a win, win).

Excited and ready to fill in the most important people of my life on the new development, I find my targets sitting on the couch. The 7 year old is playing Super Mario Bros. on the WiiU (jumping up and down as though her motions will help the poor little Mario on the screen throw his fireballs faster) and the 13 year old is listening to her IPod and texting vigorously.

They both look up and I let them know the change in my work life. The 7 year old, ever delicate with everyone’s feelings says, “That’s cool but I can’t beat this boss on here and I need you to do it.” The 13 year old smirks and informs me that she’ll be needing a raise in babysitting money if she has to be stuck with the 7 year old any longer than normal. Lol, so you know that expression “I’m kind of a big deal”? Well, as I sit down to figure the raise in money for the oldest daughter to pacify her to not lock up the 7 year old in a closet until I get home from work and take the controller being handed in my direction to beat this level, I think to myself maybe one day I’ll be a bigger deal than Mario and the worries of adolescent girls. One can always hope…

“Being a parent is like being a catcher. You’ve got to handle whatever is thrown your way.”
–Tom Swyers