Knowing

How did you know you were suited for life as a submissive/slave?

How did I know my true nature? Well, I suppose I have always known deep down even if I wasn’t sure exactly what being submissive meant or a name to call what I was feeling. I felt a certain craving for the darkness. While other teenage girls were dreaming of a prince charming, sweet and good-natured to come and find them, a much darker man was encompassing my mind. I wondered what it would feel like to be kidnapped, held against my will, tied up and made to satisfy every need of my captor.

Thinking about it now and trying to pinpoint a time of when I realized I was different, I would say it was at a very young age. My first serious boyfriend when I was a sophomore in high school was my initial introduction into the world of a dominant man. I was completely consumed and enraptured by the relationship. The relationship was not without its problems, many of which had to do with the fact that neither of knew what was really going on with us, just that he liked control and I needed to give it to him. When the relationship ended badly I thought I had been drawn to the wrong type of relationship. I spent the next years being with men completely opposite and never being satisfied as I once was, and so I assumed something was really wrong with me.

I now know that I didn’t need a man with the opposite nature that I craved; I needed the “right” man. I needed to learn what my soul has been trying to tell me all along and then find the one I needed to surrender my control to. Once I figured all of this out I instantly became peaceful. I knew without a doubt that I was on the right path and that eventually I will be where I am meant to be and with who I am meant to serve. So, how did I know I was suited for this lifestyle? My answer would be my soul has always known I just needed a little time for my mind to catch up.

“Submission is not in the bowing of heads or knees but in the humbling of your whole being (spirit, soul, and body)”

–Ikechukwu Izuakor

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